Counselling: A smart move for men
Counselling is about Strength, Not Weakness
Let’s be honest—most men were raised with the message that they need to tough things out. How many times have you heard?:
Keep your chin up
Big boys don’t cry
Be strong
Be Brave
Man up
Is it any wonder that so many men feel like seeing a counsellor or even asking for help means that they have somehow failed?
The truth is that counselling is not for the faint-hearted. Counselling can be tough. People may feel worse before they feel better. It is confronting and challenging and is one of the bravest, smartest, and strongest things anyone can do.
You’re only human
Life throws a lot at us. We can suffer from work-related stress, money worries, health issues, relationship problems…this list goes on. Sometimes there is just a nagging feeling that something isn’t quite right. No one is immune, yet we know that many men will suffer in silence. This silence can lead to isolation and burnout, alcohol and substance misuse and even violent outbursts of anger. It is a sad fact that men are more likely to die by suicide than women.
As a therapist, I know you are not broken. I am not trying to fix you. I aim to give you the tools to do this for yourself. What I can do is help you deal with life more easily by giving you the time and space to talk things through. Seeking counselling is a proactive act; it requires focus and dedication. It is not about being self-indulgent or self-pitying. If you have ever neglected servicing your car, you know that, long term, you will pay the price. Yet we often neglect to service our minds and emotional well-being.
Talking Helps (Even If You Think It Won’t)
Perhaps you have grown up with the attitude that men don’t ‘waste time talking about things’. Or you may feel that ‘talking changes nothing’. If this is the case, it can seem awkward opening up to someone you don’t know. Although talking may seem pointless, all the evidence says otherwise.
In my counselling space, you are not expected to have life sorted out. There are no expectations, no judgment and no pressure. Just someone trained to listen, help you understand what’s going on, and work with you on practical steps forward. Sometimes, just saying something out loud is enough to shift the weight you’ve been carrying. It can often lead to an Eureka! The moment when things become clear and the path forward opens up.
It’s Not All About the Past
Many people think that therapy rakes over old traumas. Well, that could be part of it, but it might not be. It’s not always about the past; it is often about what is happening right now and how someone wants to move forward in life. It may help to think of it as mental training – a gym for your mind, to build resilience and emotional strength.
It’s not just for a crisis
In fact, counselling works better if you don’t wait for the crisis to arrive. Men who seek support earlier often develop some insight and resilience before things get to breaking point. As with anything, including our physical health, we get good results with consistency, attention and support. Investing in your mental health earlier leads to better long-term wellbeing.
Taking back your power
Taking responsibility for yourself and your health takes strength. There is power in taking back control over your life. It’s not about being “emotional”—it’s about being honest with yourself about your hopes, fears, wants and desires. It is about giving yourself permission to focus on your mental well-being. It is about making positive changes. Make the change today, get in touch.