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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog</loc>
    <changefreq>daily</changefreq>
    <priority>0.75</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-03-19</lastmod>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/living-with-a-phobia</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-03-19</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1773944110341-GGGMBQ1FXUBLNV43G7DG/unsplash-image-JayJ7-sg90Y.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Living with a Phobia - Anyone who has a phobia will tell you that it is more than just a fear; it is intense and overwhelming. Exposure to the object of that fear - be it a situation, animal, or place can lead to a fight or flight response, which is difficult (and often impossible) to control. Unlike our usual everyday worries, a person with a phobia may understand that the fear may be irrational, but it takes over in such an extreme way that it starts to significantly affect their daily lives. Constantly living in a high state of anxiety can lead to other health problems, including depressive illness.</image:title>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/why-self-care-is-easier-to-talk-about-than-to-practice-even-for-therapists</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2026-01-11</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/33bab3ac-bd4b-46ae-b848-36cc90d8575e/self+care.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Why self-care is easier to talk about than to practice (even for therapists) - Self-care plays a crucial role in maintaining emotional balance, preventing burnout and supporting long-term mental wellbeing.</image:title>
      <image:caption>Over time, stressors build up, often we don’t even notice it until we start to feel exhausted, or begin to experience low mood, anxiety, irritability or feeling emotionally disconnected. In online counselling sessions, I often see how people minimise their own needs. Parents, carers, professionals and high achievers are particularly prone to putting themselves last. Unfortunately, ignoring self-care doesn’t make stress disappear; it just delays the inevitable impact.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
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  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/why-people-troll-online</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-11-16</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/6c10a107-d5d0-44ac-aec8-bbdbcec17d23/unsplash-image-NaBZhyPD2uc.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Why People Troll Online… - Trolling isn’t new, but social media and online forums can amplify behaviour that might never appear in a face-to-face conversation.</image:title>
      <image:caption>There are a few common reasons people troll: 1. Anonymity reduces accountability This is a common reason people say things they wouldn’t dare say in person. There is no accountability or immediate consequences. Hiding behind the screen leads to a drop in impulse control, and empathy soon begins to fade into the background when a person cannot see the impact of their actions on another. 2. The need for attention People may troll just to get a reaction. Even negative attention can fill this need. It can feel very rewarding to someone who is bored, lonely, angry or just struggling to make connections in real life. 3. Release of tension or difficult emotion Anger, frustration, shame, or jealousy can sometimes spill out online because the internet feels like a “safe” place to vent. 4. Unmet needs or unresolved issues When people feel powerless or unheard in their offline life, trolling can create a brief sense of control.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/midlife-for-men</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-11-05</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/ac177172-ff08-4f2c-a701-9bb7ba425fd8/man+at+gate+midlife.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Standing at the Gates of Midlife (for Men) - As careers evolve or slow down, children become independent, or relationships change, many men start questioning their role in life. You might wonder what’s next, or feel unsure about your achievements. This can stir feelings of frustration, loss, or even shame.</image:title>
      <image:caption>These moments aren’t signs of weakness; if anything, they are signs of growth. Midlife can be a powerful time to redefine success, reconnect with what matters, and make meaningful changes.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/navigating-midlife-as-a-woman</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-11-04</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/f85ed485-cb0c-4393-9dfe-787f9f85d91a/woman+crossroad.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Navigating Midlife as a Woman - Many women experience change across all areas of life:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Careers change Children grow up and may leave home Relationships can change Health concerns start to crop up Issues of identity and questions like  “Who am I now?” or “What’s next for me?” take on new importance. These are deeply human reflections, not signs of failure. It’s completely natural to re-evaluate your life at this stage.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-trauma</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-10-07</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/bc821c26-a1f7-4ac2-bb8d-6ca20ad64d9c/your+brain+on+trauma.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Trauma - Trauma has a physical impact on the functions of the brain:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Prefrontal cortex - responsible for executive functions and emotional regulation The PFC becomes less able to override fear responses from the amygdala. There is a reduced ability to make rational decisions. The person ends up in a state of ‘survival mode’.  Amygdala - responsible for emotional responses The amygdala is hyperaroused, causing hypervigilance. The person starts to experience anxiety and fear with an increased startle response to minor triggers. Hippocampus - involved with memory storage The hippocampus starts to fail when processing trauma. This leads to memories being stored incorrectly and out of context. These memories may resurface unexpectedly, and because they’re stored incorrectly, it can feel as if an event is happening right now. This causes a release of stress hormones.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/bfc8b769-b130-4a6e-96d2-f8810bb6a0c8/Your+body+on+trauma+.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Trauma - Some of the physical and emotional experiences associated with trauma often continue long after the original events. some of the most commonly report issues are:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Disturbing memories Flashbacks - both emotional and physical High levels of anxiety Low self-worth Shame, guilt Inability to trust and form relationships A variety of physical symptoms (see image) that the person may often feel is unrelated to the trauma.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/3961c094-27da-4d22-9c38-32baf293a937/The+Rs+in+trauma.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Trauma - As a trauma-informed counsellor, I fully recognise that the impact of trauma goes far beyond the mind to impact the body, emotions and a person’s sense of safety. I will work with you at your pace to help you process what happened and learn ways to manage the physical and emotional effects of the trauma. At all times, you are in control - we will move as fast or as slowly as feels safe for you. We will work on building a trusting relationship where you feel safe before we explore your deeper experiences.</image:title>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/finding-support-through-grief-and-loss</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-30</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1759241213646-Q8VAL33WEHC5V88FE2PZ/unsplash-image-Zi8-E3qJ_RM.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Finding Support Through Grief and Loss - Grief and loss profoundly impact every aspect of our lives and are deeply personal experiences. We are all unique, so the way we express our grief may be different to how we see others responding to losses in their lives. There is no one ‘normal’ way to grieve, or to navigate loss.</image:title>
    </image:image>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/34ddcbfe-439c-4859-ada5-7dafd01148b3/stages+of+grief.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Finding Support Through Grief and Loss - Grief and loss can appear at different times and in different ways. Common experiences of grief include:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Intense sadness or longing Difficulty concentrating, brain fog, loss of focus Loss of appetite Insomnia - or sleeping too much Irritability, anger and rage Feeling numb or disconnected Physical symptoms such as fatigue or tension</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/feeling-lonely-youre-not-alone</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-20</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1758374571295-NSRHOM6J5IOS6MCSBEX8/unsplash-image-EtMBNWoavoA.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Feeling Lonely? You’re Not Alone - There are a number of reasons why loneliness shows up. These can include:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Life changes Starting a new job Moving to a new area Retiring from work Ending a relationship The loss of a pet The passing of someone close</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/people-pleasing-what-it-is-why-we-do-it-and-how-to-stop</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-17</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/216babf1-0b0f-4920-8af3-d5ae590d54bc/people+pleasing.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - People Pleasing: What it is, why we do it and how to stop - Do you often say ’yes’ when you’d rather say ‘no?</image:title>
      <image:caption>Are you often prioritising the needs of other people over your own? If so, you may be demonstrating people pleasing behaviour. Of course, it is natural to want to help others, however, constant people-pleasing can start to take a toll on your mental health, self esteem and personal relationships. Learning what drives people pleasing behaviours and how to stop it can help you to feel more balanced and authentic in our dealings with others.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/ae260495-91d4-4c95-8544-7addbee596a9/Let+go+of+people+pleasing.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - People Pleasing: What it is, why we do it and how to stop - The main issues that may develop are:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Not considering your own needs: over time constantly overcommitting oneself by saying yes can cause a lot of stress, leading to burnout and exhaustion. Damages self-esteem: your sense of self-worth may become tied to what you do for others, rather than to who you are. Imbalance in personal relationships: If you are constantly overriding your own needs you may find yourself becoming resentful of others. You may feel that you are never seen or heard. Avoiding conflict can bring immediate relief from anxiety around rejection, but in the longer term it means less genuine and authentic connection in relationships. Feelings of anxiety, guilt and overcommitment - these are often associated with people-pleasing behaviour as people begin to feel more and more frazzled and stuck in a cycle.</image:caption>
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    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/2ff60fbb-a20a-4913-ac94-cf6db268da91/Embrace.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - People Pleasing: What it is, why we do it and how to stop - Breaking free</image:title>
      <image:caption>In the long run, people pleasing keeps you trapped in a cycle of guilt, anxiety, and overcommitment. It can be hard to recognise the patterns that we automatically fall into, especially if this has been happening throughout our life. Breaking free begins with learning to recognise and challenge these thoughts, learning how to assertively set health boundaries and starting to value your own needs as much as you do the needs of other people.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-black-and-white-thinking</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-13</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/f7310d84-f57d-4c9c-88ce-f4e451ce24f3/black+and+white+thinking.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Black and White Thinking - Maybe you recognise some of these thoughts:</image:title>
      <image:caption>I am a total failure They are perfect If I can’t to this perfectly, it’s pointless I can never do anything right While common, this type of thinking takes a real toll on our personal relationships and our overall mental well-being. Often this leads to misinterpretation of events.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/world-suicide-prevention-day</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-10</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/def66f1e-6a66-499c-aabc-29aa517df75c/suicide+day+10+sept.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - World Suicide Prevention Day - It can be difficult to make the first move if you don’t really know what to say. What matters the most is that you are showing someone that you care and that help is there if they need it. Sometimes it is enough just to know there is someone who cares. Here are some easy ways to reach out:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Show kindness – just asking how someone is and being prepared to really listen can make all the difference. Encourage them to seek support – people can worry about reaching out to a doctor, helpline or counsellor. Letting them know it’s OK to do this can be a step in the right direction. Keep in touch - let them know they are not alone by dropping them a text or giving them a call. Keep the lines of communication open. Take care of yourself – It can take a lot out of you if you are supporting someone; be sure to also have people to turn to.</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-procrastination-what-it-is-why-it-happens-and-how-to-overcome-it</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-02</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/329adf90-9f70-40f1-b534-07b63d55229d/unsplash-image-376KN_ISplE.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Procrastination: What It Is, Why It Happens, and How to Overcome It - Break tasks into smaller steps Large projects can feel overwhelming. Divide them into manageable steps, set small achievable goals. Set realistic goals and deadlines Take the focus away from perfection and shift your attention to progress. Celebrate the small wins; these will build confidence to complete the task. Use the “five-minute rule” Starting is often the hardest part of any task. Make a small commitment of 5 minutes to work on the task, and it will be easier to get started. Once you have started, you may find that you want to continue.</image:title>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/domestic-abuse-against-men</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-21</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1bf0e8e0-1952-442d-a585-b5df0df4c444/unsplash-image-mCOM2F_o6Yk.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Domestic Abuse Against Men - The effects of domestic abuse on men can be devastating. Just like female survivors of domestic violence, male survivors may experience:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). A loss of confidence and self-worth. Difficulties forming healthy future relationships. Feelings of isolation, shame, or fear of not being believed. For fathers, abuse can also affect parenting and the relationship with children. Children who witness abuse, regardless of the victim’s gender, may struggle emotionally and behaviourally. Recognising the hidden impact of abuse is the first step towards breaking free.</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-domestic-violence</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-21</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/7cb2a461-1c3e-4f52-b0da-7e0ca26e5d9f/unsplash-image-3zgllN5P7Mc.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Domestic Violence - Domestic violence occurs when one person in a relationship seeks to control the other through harmful behaviours. This applies across the board, regardless of the type of relationship, a person’s gender, sexuality, social group, or race. Domestic violence takes many forms, including but not limited to:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Physical abuse: hitting, pushing, or using force to cause harm. Emotional abuse: constant criticism, humiliation, or threats that undermine self-worth. Financial abuse: restricting access to money, employment, or resources to maintain control. Sexual abuse: coercion or unwanted sexual activity. Psychological abuse: intimidation, isolation, or gaslighting</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/feeling-lonely</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-09-21</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1756382538159-7HEJWAL9MVYE5TP5FPUN/unsplash-image-z_0kB0Zblx0.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Feeling lonely? - There are many reasons someone might feel lonely, including:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. Life transitions – moving home, starting university, retirement, or becoming a parent. Relationship changes – a breakup, divorce, or bereavement. Work pressures – long hours or lack of supportive colleagues. Social anxiety or low confidence – making it difficult to form or maintain relationships. Understanding the root cause of loneliness is often the first step toward change</image:caption>
    </image:image>
  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-shame</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-08-27</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/953e9232-ffb5-47a5-8539-0eb91156e356/shame+vs+guilt+.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding Shame - This difference can be spotted by listening to the internal voice associated with it and what it is saying. In shame, this is usually along the lines of, “I’m not good enough,” or “If people really knew me, they wouldn’t accept me.” In guilt, the voice is more concerned with what we should or should not have done or said.</image:title>
      <image:caption>If left unchallenged, both guilt and shame can affect self-esteem, relationships, and general mental health. The good news is that with the right support, it is possible to understand and move forward from feelings of shame, reclaiming your sense of worth.</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-and-overcoming-guilt-a-guide-to-healing-and-growth</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-08-27</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/d8810ca3-5772-4cfa-b693-b1745ff65eb3/guilt2.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding and Overcoming Guilt: A Guide to Healing and Growth - If you’re struggling with guilt, here are some proven strategies to help you manage and overcome it:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Acknowledge your feelings. Suppressing guilt often makes it stronger. Naming it allows you to begin the healing process. Separate fact from feeling. Ask yourself if you really did something wrong? Could you just be holding yourself to an unrealistically high standard? Make amends when possible. This may not always be possible, but if your guilt is linked to hurting someone, could a sincere apology help?. Practice self-forgiveness. You are only human, and human beings grow through our mistakes. Think about how you could talk to a friend in a similar situation and apply that to yourself. Seek professional support. If you are struggling, then you may benefit from talking to a counsellor who can help you untangle complicated feelings of guilt and find healthier coping strategies.</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/understanding-and-coping-with-suicidal-thoughts</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-08-27</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1756052045042-XOSKP3TDYXH9APRHF2KV/unsplash-image-SPVSeCN7p58.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Understanding and coping with suicidal thoughts - Recognizing the signs of suicidal thoughts—whether in yourself or others—can be life-saving. Some indicators include:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live. Withdrawing from friends, family, or activities. Increased use of alcohol or drugs. Expressing feelings of being a burden. Extreme mood swings or sudden calmness after distress If you notice these signs in others, do reach out and encourage them to find support. If you notice them in yourself, please seek out help. You are not alone. Samaritans (24 hours) 116 123 MindLine (24 hours) 0800 138 1692 NHS 111 (24 hours) select the mental health option IF YOU OR SOMEONE ELSE IS IN IMMEDIATE DANGER DIAL 999 FOR AN AMBULANCE OR GO DIRECTLY TO A&amp;E THIS IS AN EMERGENCY AND YOU ARE NOT WASTING ANYONE’S TIME.</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/depression-and-counselling-how-talking-therapy-can-help-you-heal</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-08-27</lastmod>
    <image:image>
      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/1755943380145-2N4F1L82QRDOB89MI8O3/1024px-Depressed_%284649749639%29.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Depression and Counselling: How Talking Therapy Can Help You Heal</image:title>
      <image:caption>Persistent sadness or emptiness Loss of interest in hobbies or activities Sleep problems - being unable to fall asleep, stay asleep or sleeping too much Feeling guilty, hopeless or worthless Lacking in energy and overwhelmingly fatigued Loss of sex drive/interest in personal relationships Becoming withdrawn from family and friends Feeling anxious, stressed and overwhelmed Starting to have thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life. If these signs are looking familiar, it may be time to consider getting some help.</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/68a6ea90f498965025d098db/800b84be-5594-4cf7-86f1-bf221373beac/1024px-Man_smiling_on_steps_%28Unsplash%29.jpg</image:loc>
      <image:title>Blog - Depression and Counselling: How Talking Therapy Can Help You Heal - Some of the key benefits of therapy include:</image:title>
      <image:caption>Brooke Cagle brookecagle, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons</image:caption>
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  </url>
  <url>
    <loc>https://www.marafrasertherapy.co.uk/blog/men-counselling-w6fs8</loc>
    <changefreq>monthly</changefreq>
    <priority>0.5</priority>
    <lastmod>2025-08-23</lastmod>
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